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Will eat your pussy NSA. Sit on it for me please!!!! Just looking for a down toearth REAL woman who wants to have some fun. Im x ,dd/free non smoker very very clean and just looking a sexy lady who wants to unwind a little Years of painstaking research has led me to believe that I've discovered the qualities of the perfect male mate to help me survive the impending zombie infestation. Many people erroneously surmise that a 'Vin Diesel' type is the ideal male survivor. My research suggests otherwise. Testosterone overload is not, in fact, the best recipe for success when the zombies come a knock knock knockin' at your door.The best male specimen will have a razor sharp wit and intellect to match, with the capability to adapt quickly and easily to any situation. Slow zombies? No problem. Fast zombies? Even better. Food shortage? Medical need? Shelter? Security? Comfort? Rubik's Cube? No problem: the perfect mate may not currently have all the answers, but he *will* have a natural affinity for learning, with an understanding of resources for knowledge, and can xxx ly (and often intuitively) grasp new information, concepts and skills. This individual should be emotionally available and secure, quick to offer a shoulder when needed, and confident enough in their skin to express their own emotions.Physically, muscle-bound jocks are not best suited for survival. The male with a better chance of succeeding can be described as average (think 'The Three Bears' - not too short nor too tall, yada yada. although a little extra weight is a preferable for those times when food may be scarce. And, besides: I *like* having a bit more to hold on to!) Additional physical characteristics such as a knock-'em-dead-smile or twinkly eyes could be just the ticket to confusing a zombie that's standing a little too close, not to mention they'd work wonders on my libido! Also important, are decent endurance and minimal physical needs. There's no real need to be an Iron Man, only capable of growth with a willingness to become healthier as the situation requires it.After compiling all the data from my research, I have concluded that, while far from perfect, I am particularly suited to survival during and after the zombie invasion. At age x , I am in the prime of my life: I am short with minimal physical needs, and just a few extra pounds (again, this could mean the difference between starvation and survival when the decent food becomes harder and harder to find. There's no better diet than the apocalypse, right?! I have waist length red-ish hair that can be tied up or braided to keep it out of a frisky zombie's mouth, and requires no weapons of mass destruction to style or otherwise beautify - just wash n' go! You'll find my attire unusual: I own only long skirts - no pants in my wardrobe. But hey! It makes getting dressed a snap: toss on a skirt and tank top, grab a sweater and go. Furthermore, my penchant for vaping e-cigs loaded with coffee, toffee, watermelon, peaches or 'nanerpus-delight flavours, and my love of vanilla and peach scented bath accessories will throw those pesky life-challenged critters off our scent by masking our all-too human smell.My off-beat humour, low maintenance personality, and adorable looks are vital in helping my partner maintain emotional well-being, necessary to long-term survival. My quirkiness suggests that few things surprise me, and I will be less likely to 'freak out' over the zombie carnage and lifestyle changes necessary during this time. I've always marched to a different tune, and what better time to showcase that ability than the 'end o' teh world'?! I'm a bundle of contradictions, and I like it that way: I prefer men who act like men, and women who are womanly. But I grew up a tomboy, and have no problem rasslin' with the boys, climbing a tree (in a skirt, no less!), co-oping in a vidgame (Gauntlet? Baldur's Gate? Heck. House of the Dead?), and stomping some zombie butt when necessary.I am quick-witted and eager to learn, a natural-born sub which means I am happy to defer to others, porn dating Dryos and I am also capable of admitting my own knowledge gaps and mistakes - a trait I'm sure you'll find refreshing in the current 'know it all xxx upper' climate we live in. To the non-zombies in my life, I am refreshingly kind - when push comes to shove, you'll find I do neither, and respect those who act the same: no need for arguing or finger-pointing. I prefer to help find the solution that makes everyone happy. a survival instinct that works wonders. Like-minded individuals garner my utmost respect. Additionally, those who can critique without criticizing, those who are natural leaders, and who appreciate the followers of life will most-likely work best with someone of my temperament.But, most importantly, my proven track record in having successfully raised xxx of the grooviest, almost-outta-teh-house, hella kewl teenz on this planet, is fine indication that I can handle any challenge tossed my way. And if that isn't enough, I am also proud mum to a Siberian Husky, Sex dating in Marion junction horny girls Tucson who would be delighted to kick some zombie butt (assuming there is a FoodReward (tm) involved. and she doesn't have an important nap scheduled. or raccoons to chase. and she's actually in the mood to kick some zombie butt. cuz sometimes, ya know, you just.don't.feel.like)So! How will we know if we are a good match and thus have a decent shot at surviving the zombies? Well, if you prefer steak to chicken - Filet Mignon to T-Bone; fine and quirky dining to mass produced mush - Cascina Spinasi to (shudder) Black Angus; DVDs to TV - SciFi to ChickFlix; books to radio - Neil Gaiman to Danielle Steele (is she still around?!); and research to guesswork - Internet to encyclopedias. there is a pretty good chance we'll fit well.However, in order to survive this impending disaster, it is of the utmost importance that we meet as soon as conceivably possible. Trial-runs for the zombies' attempt at destroying life as we know it could include midnight walks off the beaten path, critter counting and story-telling at the beach (Alki, anyone?), take-out Thai taken-out to a quiet spot inon The Far Side, cuddling on the couch and snogging (whoops, I mean discussing the impending apocalypse) 'til x am, impulsive weekend travels to a place pointed at on a map while blindfolded, etc.Ideal candidates ages x and up (not strictly enforced), not on Teh Rebound (sorry, I never made a very good ReboundGirl, and I seem to have lost my tights n' cape), and who are searching for the right mate - not just a xxx night stand kinda thing or a GoodTimeGirl, should respond immediately. Please include reasons why you think we would be a good team and a photo, self-portrait, drawing, etc., of your likeness. (Anything less goes straight to Teh RubbishBin. For reelz.)Oh! and no, I'm not a bot: yeah, I'm for real. if ya spank me, I squeal. What, no spaghetti? 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